When It Feels Like You’re Going Backwards
The Year Momentum Slowed Down
Recently, I’ve heard from many people who feel as though they’re losing ground—in their careers, sense of purpose, or confidence about the future. Sudden job losses, stalled opportunities, and broader economic or political instability have left many questioning where they stand. It can feel as though the momentum that once carried you forward has quietly disappeared, leaving you suspended in uncertainty.
When life throws us off course, it’s natural to turn inward for answers. High performers and conscientious individuals, in particular, often have an inner dialogue that blends reflection with self-criticism. It sounds like:
Could I have prevented this somehow?
Maybe if I had done things differently, I wouldn’t be here.
Why am I not doing as well as others?
The Inner Critic Disguised as Reflection
Even when there are no clear answers, many people carry a persistent sense that they should be doing more. What feels like reflection is often a subtle but constant form of self-criticism—holding ourselves responsible for things that are, in reality, beyond our control. This can lead to getting stuck in cycles of rumination—replaying decisions, searching for answers, and quietly accumulating feelings of shame, tension, and self-doubt. For high achievers, this is especially difficult. Many have built their lives on the belief that hard work leads to success, and that progress should follow a steady, upward trajectory.
When that trajectory is disrupted, it can shake a deeply held sense of identity and control. It may bring up unexpected vulnerability—the kind that doesn’t match how you’re used to seeing yourself. And often, the instinct is to turn inward even more: to rely solely on yourself, to figure it out alone, and to quietly internalize the struggle as a personal failure rather than a reflection of broader circumstances.
Breaking the Silence
Something shifts the moment we say out loud, “I’m struggling,” or “I’ve been feeling anxious,” or even, “I’m scared of what might happen.”Naming the experience softens the pressure. It creates space to breathe. It breaks the isolation.More often than not, we discover that others feel the same way—or that what we’re going through is not just personal, but part of a larger, shared experience. That realization can be deeply validating. It reminds us that we’re not alone, and that what we’re feeling makes sense in the context of what’s happening around us.
Holding Steady When Everything Feels Shaky
When the external world feels uncertain, the work becomes about finding steadiness within. Not perfection—just enough grounding to stay connected to yourself.A few ways to support that:
Stay anchored in small, meaningful routines
Maintain one or two habits that give you a sense of continuity—whether it’s exercise, a creative practice, or a daily ritual. Even small progress can remind you that you’re still moving forward.
Reduce the noise
Limit exposure to social media or constant updates. Creating moments of quiet allows your mind to settle and reduces the mental clutter that fuels anxiety.
Return to the body
When the mind is overactive, grounding through the body can help regulate your system. Gentle movement, walking, breathwork, or restorative practices like yin yoga can create a sense of calm and stability.
Seek support
Support can take many forms—therapy, coaching, community spaces, or even anonymous forums. The key is breaking the pattern of carrying everything alone.
As Oprah Winfrey once said “The more stressful and chaotic things are on the outside, the calmer you need to get on the inside. It’s the only way you can get connected to where your spirit is leading you.”
In times like these, it’s easy to believe you’ve lost momentum. But sometimes, what feels like a pause is actually an invitation—to recalibrate, to reconnect, and to move forward in a way that’s more sustainable, grounded, and aligned with who you are now.
About the author
Chiaki Sasaki, PsyD is is a licensed psychologist in California and New York who helps high achievers move from high-functioning to deeply fulfilled. Her work bridges clinical expertise with cultural depth and mind-body integration.